


I Drive Your Truck

by CR Noble (erudite12)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, M/M, Season/Series 12 Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-05
Updated: 2017-07-05
Packaged: 2018-11-23 18:50:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11408424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/erudite12/pseuds/CR%20Noble
Summary: Author’s Note: This is my entry for @cas-is-my-hero’s 100 follower challenge. Congratulations!! My prompt was “I Drive Your Truck” by Lee Brice. Saddest song ever. I cry every time I hear it, so I hope you guys enjoy all of the angst that is about to happen.





	I Drive Your Truck

**Author's Note:**

> Author’s Note: This is my entry for @cas-is-my-hero’s 100 follower challenge. Congratulations!! My prompt was “I Drive Your Truck” by Lee Brice. Saddest song ever. I cry every time I hear it, so I hope you guys enjoy all of the angst that is about to happen.

gif is not mine

It had been months since Dean had watched as Lucifer took everything he had left, and he still couldn’t believe it had happened. He was laying in his bed, staring at the ceiling, and vaguely listening to the music coming from Sam’s room. Lucifer’s kid was in the wind, but he didn’t seem to be causing any ripples, and surprisingly, there had been no noise from the British Men of Letters, either.

All in all, it had been relatively quiet; too quiet. Dean had nothing to distract himself, and it was driving him insane. He tried to pretend he was okay, but he knew Sam could see through him.

Dean was a wreck since he lost Cas. He barely ate or slept, he’d lost weight and he was exhausted all the time. He was pretty sure the only thing keeping him going at this point was the whiskey. He didn’t know what to do anymore. He and Sam had combed the papers and the web for a new case, but for once there was no noise from the supernatural world. Maybe he just needed to get out of the bunker for a while, go for a drive.

Dean threw on shoes and a shirt, and grabbed the keys to Baby as he headed out to the garage. He was already pulling open the door when he saw the tan of Cas’s truck. He shut the driver’s door and walked over to the truck.

It was an old Ford, a rolling piece of junk really. Dean ran his fingers across a spot on the quarter panel where the paint was chipping away to show the rust underneath. It was strange, seeing the truck that Cas drove for the last year of his life. It was almost like he could feel his presence. Without a second thought, he opened the door and climbed into the driver’s seat. He couldn’t find the key, so he pulled the panel under the steering wheel and hot wired the truck. It roared to life, louder than Baby.

Dean looked around the cab before he pulled the truck out of the garage. There was a half empty bottle of gatorade on the passenger floorboard, and it rolled under the seat as he eased the truck forward. The radio was on some local country station, but it was whatever Cas had listened to last, and Dean didn’t have the heart to change it.

He drove for hours, with no particular destination in mind, just trying to clear his mind. Dean had lost so much, Lisa, Ben, Mom, Crowley. None of them hurt like this. Losing Cas was the worst pain he had ever felt.  He didn’t want to stop, because he knew that as soon as he got out of the truck, he wouldn’t be able to feel Cas with him anymore. He rolled the windows down, and sped down a dark back road, not even sure where he was anymore.

Dean didn’t pay any mind to the stop sign, he just drove the truck straight into the cornfield on the other side of the intersection. He did a donut, and slid to a stop in the field. He couldn’t even hear the country music playing on the radio anymore, his mind was too soaked in grief and anger. Tears he hadn’t noticed ran freely.

“Damn it, Cas!” he yelled, slamming a fist into the steering wheel. “How the hell could you leave me like this? I never even got to tell you…” Dean’s voice broke and he didn’t hold back a single tear as the sobs shook him, he couldn’t have if he tried. He cried like that for a long while, until his cheeks, chin, and shirt were soaked, and there were no tears left to cry. He closed his eyes, and tried to steady his voice before he spoke.

“Chuck,” Dean prayed, eyes closed tightly, “I don’t know if you are listening, or if you can even hear me.” His voice broke, and he paused to regain control. “But, if you are hearing this, and you could do me one last favor… Could you just put Cas back together one more time?”

There was no answer, and deep down, Dean hadn’t expected one. He put the truck in drive and headed back for the bunker. He knew he would never see Cas again, but he would always be able to feel him in this truck.


End file.
